Something to consider is the background in which this piece will be viewed. I was getting ready to mention how much negative space there is in the lower right hand corner. However after clicking the image to inspect it in full size, I was able to see detail in that area. There is a size difference at play but the other factor is we are looking at one image on the webpages white background and the full size image is shown on a neutral gray background. The full image shows nice strip of detail nearly reaching into the corner and that watermark placement takes up the black space nicely. I make a practice of changing the background shade of my photo editor for this reason.
I think you really improved this image and IMO would consider it a success. If I had to nitpick when I click to see it large in the light box it looks amazing but maybe a tad too sharp for my taste.
